I’ll Do It Later

11 Nov

Sweet Pea hates homework.  Despises it.  Loathes it.  I encourage her, cheer her, reward her, help her, but she still hates it.  I tell her not to procrastinate.  Let’s get it done!  I say.  Then we can do other things that are fun!!

Dear Pot, meet Kettle, aka Funny Girl. 

I have homework for our therapy tomorrow and I haven’t even started it.  I’ve thought about it, but I haven’t done it.  Hubs called today to confirm the assignment.  He’s done.  I’m not.  Because I’m a procrastinator.  The worst kind of procrastinator.  I’d be happy to do it in the waiting room tomorrow morning. 

BUT, since writing is a confession of sin, I figured I would confess it and then own it.  So, I admit it.  I put things off.  And now I’m going to do my homework, right here in front of God and everyone. 

The assignment:  Write your house rules, noting which ones are negotiable and which are non-negotiable.  Then write positive and negative consequences that you currently use and whether or not they are effective. 

Here goes.

Any minute now I’m going to start typing.

I’m getting there…

UUUUGGGHHHHHHHH!!!!

Okay.  The House Rules:

1.  Safety First.  Stay in the house unless you have permission to go out.  No hitting, kicking, biting, etc.  No throwing items which can break things.  You may not hurt yourself or others.  NON-NEGOTIABLE.

2.  Take Medicine when it is given.  NON-NEGOTIABLE.

3.  Wear Hearing Aids to school.  NON-NEGOTIABLE.

4.  Do your homework each afternoon.  I am here to help you.  If we get it done then you can play.  If you don’t get it done, you do not get screen privileges or friend time.  Negotiable.

5.  Speak with Respect to mom, dad, and friends.   Speak calmly and we will listen.  If you need to scream, go in your room and close the door.  (Unfortunately negotiable, as there are plenty of times where we are all yelling at each other.)  If you need help with a friend I will gladly assist. 

6.  Respect other people’s property.  If something is not yours, please do not touch it.  This includes mom’s purse, dad’s wallet, mom’s phone, etc.  If you need something that is not yours, please ask.  Negotiable.

7. Please Obey our instructions.   We don’t ask much, so when we ask you to do something, we need you to do it.  We all have responsibilities that we don’t like, but we have to do them.  If you feel that an instruction is unfair or if there is a reason why you can’t do it right then, calmly ask if we can discuss it.  If you ask calmly, we will say yes.  We want to discuss, not argue.  If you argue we will ask you to go to your room until you are ready to discuss instead of argue.  Negotiable.

Positive Reinforcers

Earning something specific and tangible works best.  (ex:  iTunes gift card, My Meeba, webkinz, etc.)

Earning a privilege can work but can also backfire (ex:  sleepover with friend but then sleepover goes bad)

Negative Reinforcers (Consequences): 

 No screens (I think this is harder on us to enforce than it is on her to withstand)

No outside playtime (Hard b/c lately no one is available to play anyway)

“Grounded” – never works; too broad

Spanking – never works; only increases the behavior

Safe hold – necessary but doesn’t work

 

I may come back to this later tonight for some editing.  We’ll let it set for a bit and see how I feel about it.  Anyway, it’s DONE.   (Editor’s note:  I came back and added #6 after an oh-so-fun struggle over my iphone.  Geez.)

Now I can go do something fun!!

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3 Responses to “I’ll Do It Later”

  1. meg November 11, 2009 at 9:23 pm #

    So glad you are writing…..everyday…. procrastination or not.
    Just Do It! needs to be our new motto!

  2. Barb November 11, 2009 at 11:39 pm #

    Good job getting your homework done! 🙂

  3. Susan November 13, 2009 at 1:20 am #

    What or who is My Meeba? We’re in a different place right now. Rule #10 – No biting.

    Q: Matt, did you bite Kate?
    A: No.
    Q: Matt, did you sink your teeth into your sister’s leg?
    A: Yes.

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