15 Years Ago…

21 Aug

It’s a big day.  I mean a really big day.  It’s my wedding anniversary…15 years.  I can hardly believe it.  First of all, I’m not possibly old enough to have been married for 15 years.  And second, 15 years is a lllooonnnggg time, and I haven’t been married a long time. 

August 21, 1993.  I was barely 21 years old, marrying a man 6 years my senior.  Oh the joy!  I was NOT a bridezilla; I had a BLAST!  We did the rehearsal dinner thing the night before, and actually got a really good night’s sleep.  Our friends held a wedding party brunch for us on the morning of the wedding, so we saw each other…I wasn’t worried about superstition (although I wouldn’t have let him see me in the dress!).  After that it was off to the salon for hair, and then to church to start getting ready…the wedding was at 7pm.  I don’t remember dinner; probably I was too keyed up to eat anything anyway. 

When we got to the church I saw the flowers for the first time and I remember being very disappointed because they used daisies, and I thought that wasn’t formal enough.  But I blew it off, because what could I do?  Now I am so grateful for the daisies…I think they looked beautiful, and very me.  I had one little freak-out session when we put the veil on because the comb pulled a “pickle” and ruined my ‘do.  Mom came to the rescue with some old nursing cap trick and saved the day.  Later, when I removed the veil, there was a folded kleenex and lots of bobby pins that had been working their magic.  My bridesmaids were wearing absolutely gorgeous hot pink silk chanteung dresses with sleeves that mimicked my dress.  (Although now they look like they’re in a Star Trek wedding…good grief.)  I thought they were fabulous!

I had imagined the moment when the doors would open and I would enter the church a million times.  And the real thing was just as fantastic as the dream, except I was so excited that I had an AWFUL smile on my face.  I looked like I was on crack!  Poor Hubs!  The ceremony was beautiful; my dad is a minister and he performed the most beautiful wedding for us.  My friends were gorgeous, the music was perfect, it was all exactly as I had imagined it.

Since my dad was a minister at our church, we were sort of obligated to invite everyone and their dog to the wedding, which was a bit of a pain but certainly worth it when we opened all those gifts!  I didn’t know half the people that were there and Hubs knew even less.  At the reception we made a deal that we were going to hold hands and not let go for any reason so that we wouldn’t get separated and spend the evening apart.  It worked.  Also, I didn’t want to stay at the rehearsal forever…after all, this was my wedding night, and it was business time!  I laugh now when I see that we were leaving by 9:30…wonder how many people caught on?

We honeymooned at Disney World (my favorite place on earth!) and embarked on married life with parades and pixie dust.  Little did we know we’d need a whole lot more than a little bit of magic to get us through the reality that is marriage.  I guess if someone had tried to tell me how hard it was going to be I wouldn’t have listened anyway, but someone should’ve told me how hard it was going to be!!  I actually believed the fairy tale…he was my prince and we were going to live happily ever after.  I just didn’t account for all the WORK that it would take to live that dream.

Marriage is wonderful.  I wouldn’t have it any other way.  But let’s be honest…it’s no picnic.  Somehow you’ve got to figure out how to mesh two lives, two different viewpoints, two ways of doing things, and in our case, two completely different personalities into ONE successful partnership.  And then you have to rework it every time something changes, and since we’re human, that’s pretty often!  Just about the time we think we’ve got it figured out, there’s a new challenge to face.  And we’ve faced some doozies.  But here’s the beautiful thing:  I love my husband so much more now than I did before we walked through all this crap together.  I love that he is so stable that all my screw-ups can’t rock his boat.  I love that he is willing to go out on a limb with stuff that he never had to face before we had Sweet Pea.  I love that there’s never been a day when I didn’t know for a fact he was going to be there for us.  And I love the grey at his temples.  Age is HOT!  (but I digress…)

I could be so much better at the day-to-day business of marriage.  I don’t show him my gratitude enough, I don’t show him my sweet side enough, heck, I don’t wash the dishes enough.  But the big picture gives me hope.  We are in it for the long haul…better or worse (Sweet Pea’s good days and bad), richer or poorer (gas prices low or high), sickness and health (pacemaker changes and periods of stability), forsaking all others (moving to San Antonio!), until death do us part (may God give us many, many more years of togetherness before we face that one). 

Here’s to 15 more years, and even more after that!  I love you Hubs!!

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11 Responses to “15 Years Ago…”

  1. Pam August 21, 2008 at 4:07 pm #

    Welcome back! What a great tribute to your husband and marriage. I can’t believe we have been married 17 years. And to think I am ONLY “29”!

  2. Ms. B August 21, 2008 at 6:23 pm #

    Congrats to both of you. Wish I had been at that lovely wedding to throw rice and wish you well. But I am wishing you several more sets of 15 years to come.

  3. anymommy August 21, 2008 at 11:33 pm #

    That is such a fabulous picture of you and your husband. Congratulations!! I think one of the best things about blogging is writing down memories like this, so they are there for us when we forget (on those rough days) and for our kids someday.

  4. Amy Seay August 22, 2008 at 10:29 am #

    This is my favorite post of yours so far! One of the best things about you Katy is your honesty. I’m heading down memory lane now. Look how pretty you are in your wedding dress! I remember the snag in your hair and how calm your mom was about it. I remember your mom’s lovely, flowy dress and how it wasn’t anything like the dress suits that other moms wore to their daughters weddings. Your dad told the funniest story of you and razors at the dress rehearsal dinner. He was so sweet and did such a great job performing the ceremony. You were so excited and Lane, while obviously excited as well, looked like he was going to barf from nervousness at any minute. I love you! Happy 15th!

  5. Leanne August 22, 2008 at 3:12 pm #

    Thought about you 2 yesterday. I remember being at your wedding on our 17th anniversary. We celebrated 32 last night at Mark’s. Yum! Dane now says he was 3 and I was 2 when we married. Although he messed up and told Clarke I was 34 and he was 35 when we married. I don’t need to add any extra years. We love you guys and wish you many many more wonderful years together.

  6. Barb August 22, 2008 at 6:48 pm #

    Well, I was one of those people who got an invitation to your wedding because I was a member of the church. I knew your dad, but didn’t know you, isn’t that funny? We’ve all come a long way, baby. Happy Anniversary! Love ya!

  7. The Introvert August 22, 2008 at 11:58 pm #

    Happy anniversary! Love the dyeable shoes your bridesmaids are wearing. Those were definitely the staple for formal occasions back then 🙂

    Yes, I never imagined marriage would be this hard either. I knew we were opposites (good girl/bad boy) but I didn’t know the HALF of it. I thought I knew everything there was to know about him. But th dynamics of marriage change everything. Still, just like you, I love him now more than ever and I’d still marry him 🙂

  8. Kristi Lewis August 25, 2008 at 8:28 am #

    What a happy day that was!! So happy I was there with you and Lane. Many more to come. LYLAS

  9. T. August 25, 2008 at 3:57 pm #

    Happy Anniversary! And DITTO to your last 2 long paragraphs – I felt like I could have written them about my hubby! Wishing you many more blessed years.

  10. Vaniqua August 25, 2008 at 11:55 pm #

    All I can say is WOW! Talk about a blast from the past. You really do look about 16. Are you gonna let Abs get married when she’s that young? Don’t you need parental consent? I don’t know how Amy Seay remembers all of that stuff about the wedding. It’s like a fog to me & we weren’t even drinking. I still have that dress in the back of the closet at my parent’s house (Using their storage space, not mine). It would probably take a chronic illness & a couple of stomach flus to ever fit in it again. Seriously, a big congrats to you & Lane! In the words of Tim Gunn, I’m glad that you’ve “made it work.”

  11. Melinda August 26, 2008 at 2:48 pm #

    Happy 15th! I can’t believe it has been that long. Congrats! I have very fond memories of your wedding. It was so much fun!

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